is it just me or is PDA in a museum just kind of unclassy? i mean what’s with the cuddling and kissing? i get the hand holding.

in between the art and all the PDA, i concluded it must just be me.

getting flowers from a stranger…

chilling on the rooftop of the met…

making kimchi jun…

buying art from the streets…

noticing little things…

visiting chelsea market…

stumbling across a 9/11 memorial by kids…

enjoying fall…

enjoying big lunches…

loving chelsea market finds…

finding reminders of Cal…

watching the Rockefeller tree go up…

finding out magnolia bakery is not worth it…

being rewarded…

that’s all.

the show was fun. the set was amazing. best part of the night: alber elbaz <3

this is one of those songs, when it plays unexpectedly on your itunes, you kinda stop what you’re doing and just listen.

when you’re a kid.. your teacher always asks you to draw a picture of your future or write about your dreams and, to be honest, i never had one. i just drew and wrote about what people expected. like most girls and some guys, i drew the nice house, with the family and dog standing in front of the white picket fence, with nice flowerbeds. and I wrote about going to college, becoming a lawyer, getting married, having kids, whatever. but i never really thought about what i wanted, i just did it out of convenience.

then the first time i really did have to think about it was when i was applying to college. but then older people would tell me, you have college to figure it out. so i came to college and i tried to think about it some more. but then older people would say, you’re only a freshman, you have plenty of time to think about it. then the time just passed and i never really thought about it. i just thought i knew what i wanted and kinda went after it… not really.

like most people, i just kinda chose my future career options based on a bunch of guesses… what i guess i’m good at, what i guess i like doing. but then it hit me, my life would be such a waste to live it out based on some guesses. so, i don’t know if i’m wasting my time in ny right now, but i guess it’s a hell of a lot better than wasting my life.

i’ve been getting a few requests to update the blog, so i’m back w/ ramblings. i really have nothing to write about, except:

1. i never realized how much hair i shed… gross/sad.

2. when you see rats on the train tracks and they start scuttling into their holes, you’ll see a train come in 15 seconds.

another thing, i just can’t handle some peoples’ attitudes. like seriously, you’re inefficient and slow at picking up on things, you really want to add bitch to the list?

i’ve been doing a lot of cooking. i made dakdori ttang for this week. but i’ve eaten it all of 2 days now… and i’m sick of it. there’s still enough to eat for one more night, :/ … i would make smaller servings, but work drains me and i can’t cook/clean every night. i’m sick of fried rice, energy bars, sandwiches, pasta, and salads too. anyone have suggestions for lunch food? i’m running out on things that are not smelly and easy to make.

human greed is endless…

this post seems so dead and dry. apologies.

keep it simple.

people have been asking for updates, sorry it’s late, but here it is.

how’s work? work is hard. i work 12-14 hours a day and do b*work, but like andrew kim said… i just gotta assert my power in a subtle way. i’m gonna have to figure that part out, but we’ll see what happens. i realized in fashion, my college degree doesn’t mean anything. honestly, you don’t need one to do what i do, but whether it be in fashion or something else, this internship will help me answer some important questions and move me forward, so i’m not complaining.

how’s the co-workers? i work with some people who are very high-strung and stressed. they’re not mean people, they’re just rude. you know what i mean? like people who are mean are like.. purposely mean, but people who are rude are just too lazy or unaware to take that extra step to be nice. it’s like… you could say thank you, but would rather say two words less. you could look up from your computer when you’re talking to someone, but you’d rather keep reading what you were reading. things like that.

anyways, on the weekends i realize the world is still a nice place to live in.

this past sunday, i was on my way to church on the metro and there were so many families on their way to church. i could tell by what the kids were wearing. the girls were wearing pretty dresses with pretty little heels and the boys were wearing their ties and bow ties. one dad was reading his bible. another mom was wearing her deaconess badge. and i thought, this is what it means to be worshiping God. just wanting to present your best self and preparing yourself. not just rolling out of bed or rolling up in your flip flops because it’s convenient. where i come from (the plush hills of like the valley), parents don’t mind their kids going to church in halter tops and flip flops. but church ain’t no beach, it’s The House. we all have to straighten our acts. so bringing this back to the main character (me), i like to sleep… it made me late to church. and the Lord said… loving sleep will kill me. He didn’t say it like that, but that was like the jist of it somewhere in the Bible. so no more snoozing. if i can make it to work on time, i can make it to church on time.

straighten up and fly right.

anyways, start of my internship. day 1. i won’t say where i work because then i can’t talk crap about my job without getting the cut. but just to give you a picture, i visited vera wang’s studio today to drop off and pick up some things. so you kinda get the picture.

anyways, now a lot of the boys are going to ask if it’s like devil wears prada. even some of you girls. so i’ll say yes/no.

yes,

1. i work in a fashion closet.

2. i work ridiculous hours. at 7:30 pm, she said to drop something off somewhere and that i can take the rest of the day off early.

3. they don’t explain/tell me what i have to do. “here’s the kitchen, the runway closet, the resort collection/commercial pieces closet, this is so-and-so, this is so-and-so, this is so-and-so, this is my desk… … you can go work in the closet now.”

no,

1. my supervisor isn’t mean. she’s actually new too and she realized i didn’t eat and let me take my 3:00 lunch break. but she doesn’t give me attitude or anything.

2. i don’t get to take the company card or taxis. i have to train it to my locations.

3. there is no company cafeteria and people don’t not eat.

it’s interesting because while i was in the train making a run holding a heavy garment bag, sweating, and tired… i wondered what the point of it all was. there was absolutely no meaning behind my work. and what’s interesting is, now that the day is over and i thought i hated it, i actually kinda liked it. and sure my work is kinda meaningless and doesn’t require a college degree and is unpaid, but i guess even the secretary of labor had to start somewhere… like stamping presidents’ signatures on letters he never wrote. nods to professor reich.

we’ll see how these next three months go. and cross your fingers. i might work backstage at fashion week

1. how are you?

i’m fine, thank you. and you?

2. are you okay by yourself?

yes.

3. what do you do by yourself?

i go around the city. i clean. i eat. i go to starbucks to steal their internet.

4. can i stay with you if i visit?

girls, yes you can. i can fit about 3 of you comfortably, maybe 4. boys… mmm… idk. we’d be in very close quarters.

5. do you miss home?

no. not really.

6. what are you going to do now?

i don’t know. i’ll let you know though.

7. do you like it in ny?

i <3 NY.